Get an exercise ball they said. You’ll be fit they said.

I went to an aerobics class with my friend awhile back. I had ordered some new exercise clothes for my 50th attempt at getting fit. Getting dressed for the class should have been my first warning that all would not go well.

My pants were too big and my shirt, a v neck, veed way too low. Every time I moved, I was either flashing my top half or my bottom half. Then came the exercise ball. This was the last half of class and I was tired so…I thought, I’ll get the HUGE exercise ball because then my ab exercises will be easier. Which would have been true – if we were doing ab exercises. Oh noooo…we’re putting these things between our legs and lifting it over our heads.

I’m on my back, huge exercise ball between my ankles and I’m pretty much wide open when a cramp hits me in the butt cheek. My roly poly body rolls over to one side and I drop the ball. The ball is rolling through the class and as I’m chasing it down, yep, my pants fall down. I yank them up. Now I’m zig zagging through class, one hand holding my pants up, other hand over my v neck shirt, trying to catch this damn exercise ball. I finally get the stupid thing and roll it back to my spot and now we have to sit on top of the ball. This was great, except, my legs don’t reach the freaking floor when I’m mounted atop Mt. Rollopolis. And this is where I roll right off the back of the ball and thud onto the floor. I played dead until cool down. What’s really pathetic is that I fought with a girl for this round mound of death. Should have seen her smirk at me after class.

There is a lesson to be learned from this: let the skinny, twig girl have the huge exercise ball next time!

What’s your most embarrassing exercise story?

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